Things I have seen on the internet lately

Hello!

I am stuck on ideas. It's just a dry spell, I guess. Not literally, it's actually been raining a lot here. I mean figuratively. I just feel like I've used up all my good ideas! That's not true, right?!

You: No, of course not! You have so many more things to share with us. Ideas, insights...or at least you better! My Google reader is empty and I need some new things, Becks!

Well, if you put it that way:

Things I have seen on the internet lately:

1) This awesome hamburger/bacon pirate. It's from a NY Times article. On one hand I'm happy because I think I finally have an image for my first tattoo (jk jk jk), but on the other hand I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner. I love hamburgers, bacon and pirates. I've been slacking.


2) Barney's Blog. Yep. Barney from 'How I Met Your Mother' has a blog. Before you say he's not real let me just reiterate that he has a BLOG. Fake people don't have blogs! Duh! Even if you don't watch the show though, I think you might enjoy this:

http://www.cbs.com/primetime/how_i_met_your_mother/community/barney_blog/index.php

3) The Bamboozle/Hoodwink'd Website. YUP. I don't know if you've read my gchat status messages or seen my facebook updates or tweets but I am heading out to NJ for the weekend and...well...I've been looking at their website in prep for this momentous occasion. How else would I know what time each band was planning on playing, huh?!

http://www.thebamboozle.com/



UH...I guess that's it.

Things that have happened this week

A lot of people told me, they said 'Becky, I tell you what. It is going to be a weeky week this week. First, Monday will happen and then Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday will go by pretty slowly but then Bam! Friday and you're basically done with the week. Ya know what I mean there, Becky?'

'Becky?'

'Hello?'

'Bitch.'

Look, I can't listen to everything that everyone tells me all the time, can I? But whoever those people were that were talking to me, they were right. This week has been pretty typical and orderly. And yet, some things have still managed to happen. Want to hear about them?

1) I went to book club! YUP. Our Queens book club is just moving right along! We're on our fourth book now ('The Unbearable Lightness of Being' in case you're curious) and there's really no stopping us. We had some delicious quiche (once Saph figured out how long to cook it for...ehem...) and fava beans. YES! FAVA BEANS!



2) I got rained on. So the rhyme goes 'April Showers Bring May Flowers' but still. Am I an optimist if I expect it to be sunny anyway? Or is that being delusional? It's a fine line I imagine.

3) I ate red mango. OH. MY. GOSH.

Dear Red Mango,
Stop making me fall in love with you. Seriously. I know you don't ever plan on asking me out of reciprocating and I have a lot of stuff going on right now. I can't deal.

Whatever,
Becky

P.S. Yeah, I went there.

4) I watched a crazy cake-making show. WOW. I mean...where to even begin on this topic? LIKE...um...how did these people start making huge cakes? And what made them want to be crazy in their decorating of them? And why would someone put machinery in a cake? And why would someone need to use a paint brush to decorate a cake? And, how can a cake possibly weigh 100 pounds?

5) I tried to eat popeyes for dinner. That's right-tried. It's the first time ever that I tried to eat something and wasn't able to follow through. See the thing is that Debbie was going to come over because she was in my 'hood and then we were going to go to Popeyes because she'd never been there before and we were going to laugh and sing songs about how delicious the biscuits are and how tasty the chicken is...

But then we couldn't do that because...

Popeyes was having a 'sale'. And, as I explained to Jamie later on, Popeyes + Coupon + Queens = Free Pancake Day pt. 2.

6) Remembered the Holocaust. WOMP WOMP.

7) Thought about Mother Earth. She says 'Hi' back to you, by the way.

8) Fell out of love with the Strand bookstore. Apparently they have a 3 day return policy because, I don't know if you're heard this or not, because it really blew my mind, The Strand book store is in fact NOT a library but a book store. YEP. That's what the 'super helpful' manager told me.

Anyone need a copy of 'Waiting for Godot'?/want to do a craft with me that involves ripping out all the pages of a perfectly good copy of 'Waiting for Godot' that The Strand wouldn't take back...and then making them into either paper flowers or a background mat for a collage?

9) Went thrifting. I just can't enough. I just can't get enough.

10) Tweeted. YUP. twitter.com/palleyster ch-ch-ch-check it out foolz!

11) Got bored.

12) Of Writing.

13) This.

byeziessss

Things I like about Red Mango

Happy, kind of, Spring! Finally?! I don't think it rained at all this weekend which makes me THIS: ___________________________________________________________________________________ happy!

Since it's been warmer out, I've noticed a few things.

1) There are babies and dogs everywhere. I mean EVERYWHERE. I woke up this morning and there were 15 puppies and three sets of triplets walking around my apartment...w...t...f

2) I'm sleepy. You would think that all the sun and warmth would give me non-step energy but in fact the opposite is true. I want to be napping all the time.

3) I want a new ward robe. This always happens to me when the seasons change...I just get so tired of wearing the same thing, you know?!

4) I want to be drunk all the time. HMM...this might not be entirely related to spring...

5) I want to be eating frozen yogurt all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. Breakfast? fro yo. Lunch? yogurt glace. Dinner? Frozen Yogurt, please! Which leads in to my current blog topic:

Things I like about Red Mango

1) RED. I really like the color red. It is, perhaps, one of my favorites...you know besides blue, or purple, or green, or yellow, or orange. Did I miss anything?

2) MANGO. I really like the fruit mango. It's so delicious and...tasty. Can something be delicious and tasty at the same time? Does tastiness detract from deliciousness, or vice versa?

3) Low calories. Well, I don't exactly count calories...or even know what they are (something about energy, right?)...but I hear not having too many of them is a good thing. Red Mango is very low in calories so that makes me happy...um...

4) Delicious toppings. I love toppings. If something is good to begin with, and then you pile more good things on top of it, it becomes much MORE good. It becomes gooder.

5) Trendy. I am not a trendy person. Nothing I wear or say or do is trendy. I couldn't be trendy if my life depended on it. But, that doesn't mean that I don't want to be cool. And being trendy and being cool are kind of related. Because of my personal trend deficit, I have to explore other avenues to earn 'cool points'. Enter Red Mango. It oozes trendy, doesn't it?

6) COUPONS! Lately, Red Mango has been issuing awesome coupons. First there was the $1 off coupon, now there's the 'get any small yogurt with 1 topping for free' coupon. It makes me so happy!

7) Promoting positive self image. See below:

8) (I don't know why this is last but) Tastes good. MMMM! The balance of sweet and tart in the original yogurt is to die for. Not literally but, you know how it goes.

Things I have been doing instead of blogging

Well, Passover is O-U-T OUT OF HERE! WOO!

What's that?

How was it?

Aw, that is so sweet of you to ask! I really appreciate it! UM...it was good. Yeah, really good. What's that?

No I didn't.

No I didn't.

I didn't say 'good' in that fake voice you use when things aren't actually good but you say they are because you don't feel like going into it.

No I didn't! Anyway, how were your holidays?

Oh awesome! What color?

Did you take any pictures?

Can you put them on facebook? Now that we have that convo out of the way, let me tell you why I haven't blogged in over a week (feels like longer doesn't it? I think so too)

Things I have been doing instead of blogging:
1) Not eating bread.

2) Or cookies.

3) Or bagels.

4) Wearing sweatpants. I usually blog at work and I only wear sweatpants to work on Friday...so it's safe to say that if I'm in a routine that involves me NOT wearing real pants (i.e. only wearing elastic band sweatpants) I won't be blogging.

5) Going to Funnecticut. I don't usually blog when I'm Funnecticut either. I don't have my own computer there and my family members get suspicious if I'm on their laptops for too long. I don't know why (*co(pornring...lookitreallywasn'tmyfault...I had no idea that if you clicked on that picture it would be you to that website)*ugh).

6) Celebrating Debbie's birthday! YEAH! It was Debbie's birthday on Tuesday so we went and did things for that like...um...getting a $10 well drink/I don't remember how much that cappucino thingy cost and...um...we watched '30 Rock' (don't ever go with a hippie to a second location)

7) Watching TV. OMG, first I saw this episode of 'Oprah' where um...she pretended that she was God and then she interrupted someone while they were in the middle of talking. And then I watched about 18.4 episodes of 'Made' on MTV...no more no less. AND um...old episodes of SNL and stuff. Oh wait, do I have to pay NBC royalties to have SNL mentioned in my blog?

8) I tweeted. Yeah, I'm all on twitter now...if you are, let's stalk each other! oh, I would give you my user name but I don't want just ANYONE knowing my everyday whereabouts, you know?

9) Shopping. UGH, remember when I didn't buy things for a while and then I wasn't spending as much money? Yeah, well...that time is long gone. Now I can't seem to STOP buying things. I've gotten four pairs of new shoes in the past three days! Granted, one was for a wedding, the others were on sale and can be used for work...but still.

10) Watching 'Rock of Love Bus'. I know I said I wouldn't watch it and here I am...watching it. To be fair, I have only watched a few episodes and I mean, I only watch it when nothing else is on. It's not like I DVR it. No, really. I haven't been DVRing it.

In short, I will try to blog more often. Luv u lots, k bai! xoxoxox

Things I like about Passover

Well, Chag Sameach everyone! (Oh, do you know what Chag Sameach means? It's Jewish for 'Happy Holiday'. Either that or 'Pass the Cream Cheese'. I can't be sure. They're both used so often).

It seems like just last year that I was celebrating Passover. Thinking of foods that are tasty but don't have bread in them. Dreaming of rolls and bagels and cookies and cereal and beer.

Waking up and falling back asleep to dream of rolls and bagels again. Then getting up, pissed, grabbing a glass of water, and going back to sleep to dream about bagels. I really like bagels, OK?

And now, here I am again. What a year!! I've done so many things like...um...didn't I go to your party? Was it your birthday or something? UM...and I've watched a LOT of TV like 'The Real Housewives of Atlanta' and the 'The Real Housewives of Orange County' and 'The Real Housewives of New York City' and 'Top Chef'. And I've cooked and eaten. I've slept and I've woken up. I've gone places and stayed at home. I've gone to Temple and then sinned (sometimes while at Temple...actually...only while at Temple). Celebrated holidays and celebrated Saturdays. You know, this and that. I don't like to brag...like some people...

So now that Passover's here again, and let it be clear that I actually do REALLY like Passover, I thought a little listy-poo might be in order. You've been missing the lists, I can tell.

Things I like about Passover

1) Matzah. Yeah, I actually really like Matzah! It's a nice, big sized cracker...mmmm. Who doesn't like crackers? You can put ANYTHING on them and they taste just fine. I don't understand what the fussing and sassing is about. Crackers + moral message based on a history that might be fake = awesome!

2) Seder. I just love eatting meals. It's so fun, isn't it? Just having all that food in one place at one time...it's like a big party! Sometimes though, if there's a lot of food on my plate at once, I get lost. I don't know what to eat first or what to save for last. I end up staring at my plate and trembling because I'm afraid of making a bad decision...

But with a Passover seder you're told when/what to eat! It's great. You know that you eat the Hillel Sandwich before you eat your Gefilte Fish. You know that the Brisket (the best part of the seder) comes after you eat the hard boiled egg (does your family do that too?). It's so relaxing...and that's the whole point!

3) Matzah Ball Soup. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Matzah Ball Soup is seriously delish (right Jamie?) and so easy to make too!
4) Time with family. UM...Well, I get to spend time with my family at Passover and that's usually nice. We chat. We eat. We watch TV. Sometimes we play games. Sometimes we argue for an hour and it's very uncomfortable for everyone involved.

5) Time off from work. Oh yes, I get FOUR DAYS OFF in the next WEEK! FOUR DAYS! Most of them I'll spend doing nothing but...that doesn't make them less special or dear to me. They're very dear to me. I might even go to the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens next Thursday!

6) Game. This could probably be included under 'seder' but I don't feel like including it. End of story. So, there's a game in the seder where you look for the Afikomen (this piece of Matzah that's broken off from the rest of the stack, wrapped in a cloth or napkin) and if you find it, you, um, well like sometimes, if I find it, and I tell my mom, I get a prize! Games are awesome! Because a game is involved in the Passover seder, Passover is therefore awesome!

7) Egg Salad. I eat a lot of egg salad during Passover. UM, I could probably eat it at other times but in my mind it's bad for you. You're not supposed to eat that many eggs are you, like one a day right? Anyway, I end up eating a lot of egg salad during Passover which makes me happy because I like eggs even though they..um...potentially are bad for you.

8) Time to reflect. Oh you know the whole 'we were slaves in Egypt' thing. I would reflect on it more now but I don't want to jump the gun...this holiday's 8 days and it hasnt' started yet! What if I were to use up all my good reflective thoughts now? That would be a shame

Things I like about Puppy Petite

I don't know why I've been such a tease lately. I keep starting things and then not finishing them. It's like I'm testing you or something...except I'm actually not. I don't care enough to test you.

OH SNAP!

But really...

Yesterday I told you about perhaps the COOLEST website in the world. Well, I didn't tell you too much about it...but now I will.

The website can be accessed at: www.puppypetite.com and is called 'Puppy Petite'. It's based out of Brooklyn, New York. Of course. What the hell ISN'T based out of Brooklyn, huh?! You tell me! But anyway, it's amazing and here's why I think so. **PLEASE NOTE that in order to view the pictures well you need to click on them and view them in a separate window***

Things I like about Puppy Petite:
1) Cute puppies! There are a lot of, as you could have guessed, petite or little puppies on this website. They are really adorable because they basically look like cats.


2) Hair Bows! Most, if not all of these puppies have hair bows on them. I'm kind of trying to bring hair bows back...or, well, I was when my hair was shorter. I still think they're ridiculously/obscenely cute though and I appreciate that whoever is watching over these dogs decided to accessorize them thus.

3) Bling. There is so much bling on this webpage...just...wow. I mean, I almost can't handle it. Don't worry, I said 'almost can't handle it'. I'm fine. Really.


4) 'Petite'. The name of the website appeals to me because I am a French snob. I don't think 'puppy' is the French way of saying...um...'puppy'...but petite is the French way of saying 'small' and I think it's awesome. Any website that allows me use my French skillz and feel superior is a winner!




5) Humane. According to the website, 'babies' need to be picked up in person...they don't do shipping. Well how nice of them! I mean, most other puppy stores ship their 'babies' in padded envelopes with no air holes...but not puppy petite! They're a step above the rest! GO BK!


6) Music. Whether it be the random R&B song that plays along to the animated puppy on the home page, or the instrumental version of 'Accidentally In Love' that plays along with a video on the Yorkie page...all of the music that plays on Puppy Petite is priceless.

7) Media. There are animated pictures of puppies and videos of puppies and pictures of puppies to scroll through and flashing diamond sparkles...could this website be any more involved? I LOVE IT!