An interview, pt. 1

Hey There!

LONG. TIME. NO. TALK. for you. Except Jason. Who hasn't read any of the entries on this blog, but at least visited it, did a CTRL + F dealie for his name, and commented on all the entries where I've mentioned him.

Erin (you know her, right? we went to college together...and she'd love to tell you a story about the first time I got really drunk. this story would obviously be a fable cuz I don't even know what alcohol is) sent me a link to a website this morning called 'www.therumpus.net'.

What is that? She explained it was an online magazine about CULTURE (as opposed to pop culture). I was curious, so I went to the website. Almost immediately I found an interview of two sisters. Something about one of them being a lesbian and both of them being really close? The sisters took turns interviewing each other and I found it to be an interesting read.

HERE: http://therumpus.net/2010/10/the-funny-women-interview-the-soloway-sisters/#more-64584

I thought, since I have a blog, and I have a sister, I should copy these two ladies. A little background on me and my sister, Kate.

Here's a picture of her:

She's whatever age you want to think she is. She's a Rabbi. She works at a University in NOWHERE, PA (but there is a roller-skating rink there...where I fell and hit my head...and got a bruise that started drooping down into my eyelid). She reads. She writes. She keeps me company. SHE IS OLDER (ha!)

The first part of this 2 part series is questions that I posed to Kate, that she answered. Read and enjoy :)

1) If you could be a sandwich, what kind of sandwich would you be? why?
So the first thing that popped into my mind was a reuben. It has rye bread, which is an interesting flavor--it looks like flavorless bread, but it so isn't! Then there is pastrami (delish!) and there is melty cheese, both of which are comforting (and fatty, or because they are fatty). Then there is the sauerkraut, and interesting tang and texture, but one that is necessary to the composition. Mmmmm.

2) Why do you like me so much?
A little presumptuous, but I will roll with it. I like your sense of humor, and your general positive approach to life. I like that you introduce me to things and keep me young. I like that you aren't intimidated by me.

3) What would you say is your most embarrassing moment?
Oh goodness, where to begin? The most embarrassing was being pantsed in the hallway of Dolan on the way to the cafeteria. It was the most embarrassing because embarrassment encompassed my whole body in a way it's never done before or since, and because everyone was laughing and I felt ultimately alone in my embarrassment

4) If you won $1 million what would you do with it?
Pay back my student loans, yours, and Josh's medical bills. The rest I would invest for Chewbecca. And I would take a vacation to somewhere far, like Australia or India, or both!

5) Describe your ideal romantic match.
Someone funny, some thoughtful and compassionate, someone with his own life and interests, someone who wouldn't let me turn him into my satellite.

6) Oliver Stone called for you today. Seriously. He said he's interested in making a movie of your life-to-date. Who's going to star in it? Describe 4 scenes from that movie.
So the young me would be played by Ariel Winter. The grown up me would be played by Mary Louise Parker, or Melissa McCarthy.

Opening scene: me running around the concentric circles of the kindergarten rug while mom and a teacher try to get me to sit and take the test to get into kindergarten early. I failed.

Another scene: learning to drive with 800 feet of snow and ice on the road.

Another scene: directing The Complete Works of Shakespeare in college, missing the dress rehearsal for the first seder I ever hosted, and having a kid tell me at the end of the weekend that he came to all three shows because it was so funny.

Another scene: bringing a gun to my head while sitting in my office at SU and typing this answer because it is so fucking long!

7) What song do you identify with most?
It depends on my mood. This is a song I listen to when I am feeling a bit frazzled:



It just speaks to me, and I feel like I am getting good personal advice.

8) If you were a color what color would you be? why?
This also depends on my mood. Lately I have been feeling more red, maybe because I have a fever and am feeling hot. I also have been doing this mindfulness thing on Wednesday evening, and when I just sit with myself, I try to feel my blood flowing, doing it's business.

9) Why do you like me so much? Oh, I already asked that. What do you like about you so much?
I like that I am genuinely on a path of self-awareness and self-development.

10) What are you doing for the rest of the day?
I have a conference call, then I have to go to the pharmacy to pick up my prescription for fertility drugs, then mindfulness, then bed.

(this interview was conducted on Wednesday, November 10th, 2010.)
(this entry is being posted on Thursday, November 11th, 2010.)