Things that happened last night before I went to bed

I didn't get home until 9:40 last night. WHOAAAAA, so late right?! Gosh, what was I doing out so late?!

I was really tired on the subway home and really full (from Shake Shack...mmmmm). During my 30 minute ride I thought about how great it would be to have my bed on the subway so I could lie down. Have you ever thought about that? About how it would be awesome if a bed was portable and you could just bring it anywhere? Like 'Oh I'm kind of tired from grocery shopping, let me take a quick nap *BAM* *OUT POPS PORTABLE, LIGHT WEIGHT BED*'. I have faith that someone can invent this...though I know that having my bed on the R train wouldn't be great at all because then my bed would get dirty and I'd be lying down in it with all these strange people staring at me.

I was really tired when I got home. I wanted to go straight to sleep.


But, I didn't.

Instead I did the following things:

1) Talked to Jamie. Jamie and I like to talk a lot. It doesn't feel like we talk TOO much...but hours do tend to pass while we sit on the couch and gab. And let's not forget the fact that even with DVR and NO commercials on TV it takes us over an hour to watch an hour long program.


2) Ate two cookies. I've heard that it's a really good idea to eat cookies before you go to sleep. Something about empty calories and eight hours of sleep and lying down...something about that's good for you. Or maybe the opposite.

3) Looked at the pile of mail in the kitchen. Julia said she was going to send me something for my birthday but I haven't received it yet. So I keep checking the pile of mail that I've already brought into the apartment and looked through several times to see if maybe, by accident, I'd missed Julia's package. I don't think it makes sense either.

4) I got into bed and opened my book. Don't misunderestimate me...I didn't read the book, I just opened it.

5) I thought about reading my book. Don't misunderstand me...I didn't read the book, I just thought about reading it.


6) I lay in bed staring at the ceiling. How long can someone stare at the ceiling? 5 minutes? freezing cold. 10 minutes? cold. 20 minutes? warmer. 25 minutes? DING! DING! DING!

(I WISH my ceiling looked like this)

7) I thought about what I wanted to wear today. I do this a lot...in fact if you're ever talking to me and I'm zoning out it's safe to say that I'm contemplating something ward robe related like a) what I want to wear tomorrow or b) what I want to wear for a specific event or c) what i want to buy so that I can wear X to tomorrow or for a specific event.


And then it was 11:15.

So much for going to bed early.

Things that were great about my weekend

I have something to tell all of you. It might come as a shock given the recent state of things and if what I'm about to tell you makes you uncomfortable then I really apologize. But I just can't take this anymore and I have to tell someone.

I had a pretty good weekend. There. I said it! WOW! That wasn't so bad. I should have just come right out with it. I can finally breathe again.

I've been holding in my excitement and the cross was just getting too large to bear.

Things that were great about my weekend:

1) Birthday presents! If you read my blog post from a few days ago about my birthday or have ever talked to me in person you know I love birthday presents. Well, this weekend I got a few more! 'The Sex & The City Movie', some $$$ towards my new laptop, several bottles of vodka...I must be the luckiest girl in the world...well, besides Sarah Palin.


2) Gossip Girl. OK, so those of you whole me I absolutely HAD to watch 'Gossip Girl' because it was MY type of show...were right. I really do love it! It's just so...stupid and empty. I don't have to think while I watch it. In fact, I'm pretty sure that even if I was in a coma I might be able to follow it. But anyway, the episode I watched on Saturday morning was GREAT.

3) Raining. Well, the rain wasn't really great for me but the trees were appreciative.

4) Arrested Development Party. Yes, that's right. I hosted an 'Arrested Development' themed birthday party. It was pretty great. I had decorations and people came dressed in costumes. We screened some episodes of the show and drank juice. Damn...how can I ever top this?!

5) Alcohol. I got four bottles of vodka from various attendees of my party. SO. MUCH. ALCOHOL. Even a lush like me will be set for a good three or four weeks with that amount of booze. Just kidding. three or four days;)

(I don't quite understand what this ad is saying but vodka + city = Becky is along the lines of what I was thinking)


6) Sleepover. I kind of like to sleep diagonally in my bed...but I kind of like to have sleepovers too. Because of my party (forget what I'm talking about already? see above) I got to have friends sleep over at my place.
My friends are like figurines in the living room of a crazy, old, cat lady. So when I hoard my friends in one place for a party and then they decide to stay longer and sleep over it makes me feel really popular and accomplished.


7) Pumpkin seeds! I really like pumpkin seeds. Fresh are preferable, but even store bought pumpkin seeds brighten my day (except for those shitty pumpkin seeds from Trade Fair. EW. DON'T GET THEM!). Yesterday I went to New Jersey to visit Elizabeth and we carved pumpkins and then made pumpkin seeds. It was really great. Oh and I had fun seeing Elizabeth and her crew too ;)

8) Friends and family. Well, this is kind of redundant but I got to see a lot of my friends this weekend and my brother and sister. It was great :) I like my friends...they're tops!

Things I like about TV

Oh hello! Well it's a pretty gross day outside today. The wind is blowing, rain might be falling ANY minute now, and it's kind of chilly. So, what do I do on a day like this? Zip up my rain parka and hit the streets with umbrella in hand and boots on my feet? You wish! When the weather's really gross I sit in my apartment and watch TV.

OHHHH TV. What a faithful friend.


Things I like about TV

1) Black. Well, not all TVs are black...but mine is. Black is just so sleek...and smart looking. And I'm all about looking smart.

2) Dependable.
My TV is always there for me. Sure sometimes it doesn't record all of the TV programs that I ask it to (that might be the DVR's fault though...), but nothing is perfect.


3) Agreeable. One of the biggest problems I have with other people/things is that they have opinions. As I recently found out, I'm stubborn and I like when people/things agree with me. Better yet, I like when people/things don't have opinions and mold themselves to my wishes. Anyway, my TV turns on when I need it to and stays quiet when I'm not at home or sleeping. It adjusts its volume to fit my needs and changes channels at my every whim. You might argue that I actually adjust the volume and change the channels on my TV...and I'd have to agree. Wait, what?

4) Evening plans. Sometimes it's a lot of hard work having a life. You have to call people and g-chat them to make plans. You have to look through your calendar and make sure you have free time. You have to you know, 'coordinate' and 'compromise'. But with TV you don't have to do that. You don't have to ask TV when it wants to hang out or what kind of food it feels like eating. Isn't it nice after a long day at your mediocre job in your crazy office to just come home and spend an evening with TV (and your room mate? SEE?! I BLOG ABOUT YOU!). It's just so easy.



5) Rhymes with Becky. TV. Becky.
There once was a thing named TV
Its job was to entertain BeckY
It sat and waited and contemplated
What Becky would want to see-E.

6) Entertaining. Sure you have to do all the work...plug it in, turn it on, adjust volume, change the channels....but then isn't your entertainment more rewarding? And what's more, isn't it interactive? I love hands-on fun! (that's what she said).


7) 24/7. TV is on all the time. I think that's just great! That means if I wake up early in the morning and have a few minutes to spare before I take a shower that I can watch it. And it also means that when I get home from work at 6:15ish (if I come straight home of course...which, like, barely ever happens because I'm so popular and busy. ha. ha. oh man, it's really hard to lie...even online) it'll be there waiting for me to watch it. And it also means that if I come home from work at 1:40ish (on a Friday) I can watch a show or two or fifteen. TV is just ALWAYS on...does this count as 'dependable'?

Eh whatevs.

GOODBYE!

Things I like about my birthday

HEY Everyone! As you may or may not know Tuesday was my birthday. Yep...23 years + 3 days ago my mom gave birth to me. 23 years + 4 days ago there was no ME...I can't imagine a world like that. And I don't want to.

I really like my birthday. Well, actually...that might not be true. I like the IDEA of a birthday...or more specifically mine. A whole day dedicated to celebrating ME and geared towards giving ME presents and doting on ME. I don't know about you, but I find that very appealing.

Celebrating my birthday, got me thinking about my birthday. It's kind of great, but how so?

Things I like about my birthday:

1) Presents. Is this too obvious? I mean, everyone likes presents don't they? Well...maybe not journalists if they're interviewing people (conflict of interest) or nuns since they've taken a vow of poverty (conflict of interest) or minimalists (conflict of interest)...those types of people might not like presents. But I think everyone else, like you and me, definitely appreciates a good gift.

2) Excuse for being bitchy and demanding. Normally I hide my bitchy-ness behind giggles and innocence. "Oh, was I being bitchy? I'm sorry...except *giggle*...I don't even know what bitch means." Furthermore, when other people point out to me that I'm being bitchy I feel shameful and I can't even enjoy it. I feel bad about making other people feel bad with my 'tude. But on my birthday I can be as bitchy and demanding as I want to. I don't HAVE to care or pretend to care about other people. It's really awesome.


3) Alcohol. Normally I'm the one pressuring other people to get drunk. ('It's ok to do a keg stand in a skirt. No one'll be looking.' or 'You have to work early tomorrow? Just quit your job and then you can stay out as late as you want to and drink! unemployment is the new black anywayz') But on my birthday people actually ENCOURAGE me to drink and WANT to drink with me! I don't have to nurse bottles of vodka alone in my room or worry that the guy in the liquor store is starting to remember my face.

Instead, I get to drink in public with my friends and for free too. Can you beat that?!

4) Cake. Any day that encourages cake-eating is a good day in my book!

5) Mail. I love getting mail. Like, really love getting mail. Normally though, because of the internetz and because of my cellie I don't get post (I don't know why I'm trying to be British but let's just go with it, ok?). But on my birthday I get mail...and usually mail in colorful envelopes with candy or money included! It's so much fun!


6) Friends. I like spending time with my friends. Living in the big 'ol city gosh darnit, it's hard for a josephine six pack like me to always get to spend time with all of my gal pals and best buddies (I don't know why I'm trying to be Sarah Palin but let's just go with it, ok?).

But on my birthday people put aside their other friends and their 'lives' and 'schedules' for me...and we get to hang out and it's fun :)

EXHIBIT A:

EXHIBIT B:
EXHIBIT C:There's nothing quite like making people feel obligated to hang out with you . I mean you don't have to come out for drinks on my birthday...I was just there for YOUR birthday with a card and a bouquet of flowers I mean...no, no. It's fine. Whatever.

7) Legitimacy. The older I get the more credible I seem as a human being. When you're older people believe what you say cuz you've 'been there, man'. And, I imagine, people say things like 'what are you 16?' less and less the older you get. 'I'm not 16, ok?! I'm 23! That's 7 years older than 16!'

I can't imagine why people pick on me so much.

8) Nostalgia. I can't help but think about where I've been and all the great things that have happened in my life around my birthday. It's nice to remember my friends and family and all the places I've been...I've done some cool shiz.

Guest Blog: Sick and Bored

I'm Debbie, most of you know me, and if you don't, well you should, I am awesome. I am home sick from work today, and feeling pretty bored, so Becky suggested I blog for her. Now, those that know me might be thinking, don't you have your own blog that you never write on? Why don't you just blog for that? Well silly, because I could do that anytime (even though I don't and probably won't). So anyway I am all congested, and it makes it hard for me to think, so I am just going to steal an idea that Becky already posted about, her series on celebrities she'd like to be friends with, her list is bizarre, I can assure you that mine will be better.

1. Barack Obama – um, because he is awesome, and I could prob use more black friends to help my cred. Also, we could talk about the wire and how much we love arugala and soy chai lattes. and you know, just being good, fun liberal elitists.

2. Tina Fey – 30 Rock is the best, and I would love to be able to hang out on the set, and see all the outtakes, and you know, all that good stuff

3. Stephen Colbert & Jon Stewart – Yeah, they sort of go together, right? I think we would have so much fun making sarcastic comments about the world and stuff.

4. Sarah Vowell – She is an author that maybe you haven't heard of, you should google her because she is really hilarious. I also think that we are similar people, and that she would really like me, and I would really like her. I know she lives in Chelsea, so if I ever happen to bump into her on the street right in front of her apt. well I would go buy her a soy chai latte and get right down to the business of us being besties.

5. Brad Pitt – I just like to look at him.

6. Paul McCartney – I am obsessed with the Beatles, like for serious, and I would love if Sir Paul could regale me with stories and serenade me with songs, and maybe share one of his herbal jazz cigarettes with me.

I am getting kind of bored of this, so I think I am going to close up shop. Since this is Becky's blog I feel like I need to mention the following things before I depart: sunshine, rainbows, kittens, headbands and giggles. Okay, I think that about covers it.

Depending on how bored I am later in the day, maybe I will write again.

Things I'd like to do tonight

Another hour and a half of work. HMMM. What to do? I kind of have to sit around my desk and look productive but...that's so boring. And I'm not very good at looking productive.

I guess I'll blog then.

UM...HI.

So my first day back at work in a week has been pretty good. I got my BOOTS delivered in the mail today and I'm really looking forward to wearing them. I got a cookie from Dan which was super delicious. I mean, cookies before 11 am are ALWAYS delicious but these ones were especially tasty.

And what else? I ate a well-balanced meal in the sukkah. Might I add that the sukkah looked much better than it did last year so whoever set that up did a great job!

(Our sukkah looks something like this...except it has a long table and has four walls and isn't made out of wood and is on the roof of our building...)

But, I digress. Let's get to the real meat of this entry. If you're like me then you spend most of your work day thinking about what you'd like to do once you're out of work. Maybe you want to go out to dinner with a friend or take a walk through the park. Maybe you have a load of laundry that really needs to get done. Maybe you just want to get the F out of your office and have a beer in your bed. But whatever your plans are, you're thinking about them.

That being said, aren't you curious about what I'd LIKE to do tonight?

1) Watch TV. I watch a lot of TV, it's true. But it's not because I'm a boring person or a couch potato (mmm...speaking of potatoes...wouldn't mashed potatoes be super delicious tonight? I think so!)...it's because I just like a lot of TV shows? I have old episodes of 'The Rachel Zoe Project', 'Intervention' and 'The Real Housewives of Atlanta' to watch. Busy, busy, busy!

2) Download music. Legally of course (by legally I mean not legally at all...but don't tell anyone, ok? I don't want to get in trouble!)...

3) Other things on my laptop. Like maybe watch 'Weeds' (that sort of counts as TV but since I don't own the show on DVD I have to watch it online on my computer...which is not a TV so...you see where I'm going with this) or make a facebook photo album with all of my Canada pictures (they came out really well btw. like REALLY well...like so well that you should all check my facebook and comment on EVERY picture. am I being demanding?)

(What my laptop actually looks like. Cute isn't it?!)

4) Eat ice cream. My soy cherry chocolate chip is just calling my name...

Ice Cream: Becky! Hey! Is that you? Or is that squeaking noise coming from the mouse that's underneath the radiator in the livingroom?
Becky: Shutup! Of course it's the mouse and not me. A) I'm at work right now and B) My voice isn't THAT high!
Ice Cream: Oh there, there. Don't be so testy. You know what I think would help to cheer you up?
Becky: *Being testy* What?
Ice Cream: A bowl of me. I'm so delicious and soy-y and...not THAT unhealthy.
Becky: MMMM


5) Go Shopping. Miriam got this cute new sweater today that I'm kind of really into. But, I just bought a dress and a hoodie at Old Navy so I probably shouldn't buy another sweater...but it's so cute. OMG!

6) Catch THE mouse. Yes, I know. You're probably as shocked as I am. HOW IS THAT STUPID MOUSE...or rather THOSE STUPID MICE...living in my apartment?! Why haven't they left?! I don't know. But it's kind of insane and I'd like them to be gone STAT.

7) Drink a cocktail. Shouldn't really surprise any of you. I'm kind of a lush...

8) Sleep.

9) Find a million dollars.


10) Seduce a hot man (not that I'd ever do that).

Celebrities I'd like to be friends with-Installment 3

HELLO! Today I'm doing something new...I'm blogging at home instead of at work. And actually, I'm blogging on my NEW laptop...so I'm really breaking out of my shell.

Gone are my days spent as a hermit...sitting in my room...not answering phone calls...wearing potato sacks. I'm a new woman.

Anyway, how are you all doing? I bet you're at work today and furthermore I bet you didn't just go to Canada...so you're probably not doing as well as I am :)


Why am I being so obnoxious?

Let me continue with the list of celebrities I'd like to be friends with so you don't punch me in the face.

1) Sharon Osbourne. I've always loved her. I don't know if it's because I wish she was my mom, or if it has anything to do with her red hair or British accent. At any rate, I watched the TV show 'The Osbournes' in high school...and since then I've been contemplating how I can get Sharon Osbourne to be my bestie. I thought about writing her letters, but then I realized that she probably doesn't check her own mail anyway. I thought about sneaking onto Ozzy Osbourne's tour bus...but then I remembered that I don't really like his music and I'm conspicuous. I thought about shacking up with Jack Osbourne and infiltrating the Osbourne's/Sharon via...well...you know but then I remembered who I am and realized that wouldn't work. Any who, Sharon Osbourne's super sweet and I'd love for her to be my bestie!