Things I like about my birthday

HEY Everyone! As you may or may not know Tuesday was my birthday. Yep...23 years + 3 days ago my mom gave birth to me. 23 years + 4 days ago there was no ME...I can't imagine a world like that. And I don't want to.

I really like my birthday. Well, actually...that might not be true. I like the IDEA of a birthday...or more specifically mine. A whole day dedicated to celebrating ME and geared towards giving ME presents and doting on ME. I don't know about you, but I find that very appealing.

Celebrating my birthday, got me thinking about my birthday. It's kind of great, but how so?

Things I like about my birthday:

1) Presents. Is this too obvious? I mean, everyone likes presents don't they? Well...maybe not journalists if they're interviewing people (conflict of interest) or nuns since they've taken a vow of poverty (conflict of interest) or minimalists (conflict of interest)...those types of people might not like presents. But I think everyone else, like you and me, definitely appreciates a good gift.

2) Excuse for being bitchy and demanding. Normally I hide my bitchy-ness behind giggles and innocence. "Oh, was I being bitchy? I'm sorry...except *giggle*...I don't even know what bitch means." Furthermore, when other people point out to me that I'm being bitchy I feel shameful and I can't even enjoy it. I feel bad about making other people feel bad with my 'tude. But on my birthday I can be as bitchy and demanding as I want to. I don't HAVE to care or pretend to care about other people. It's really awesome.


3) Alcohol. Normally I'm the one pressuring other people to get drunk. ('It's ok to do a keg stand in a skirt. No one'll be looking.' or 'You have to work early tomorrow? Just quit your job and then you can stay out as late as you want to and drink! unemployment is the new black anywayz') But on my birthday people actually ENCOURAGE me to drink and WANT to drink with me! I don't have to nurse bottles of vodka alone in my room or worry that the guy in the liquor store is starting to remember my face.

Instead, I get to drink in public with my friends and for free too. Can you beat that?!

4) Cake. Any day that encourages cake-eating is a good day in my book!

5) Mail. I love getting mail. Like, really love getting mail. Normally though, because of the internetz and because of my cellie I don't get post (I don't know why I'm trying to be British but let's just go with it, ok?). But on my birthday I get mail...and usually mail in colorful envelopes with candy or money included! It's so much fun!


6) Friends. I like spending time with my friends. Living in the big 'ol city gosh darnit, it's hard for a josephine six pack like me to always get to spend time with all of my gal pals and best buddies (I don't know why I'm trying to be Sarah Palin but let's just go with it, ok?).

But on my birthday people put aside their other friends and their 'lives' and 'schedules' for me...and we get to hang out and it's fun :)

EXHIBIT A:

EXHIBIT B:
EXHIBIT C:There's nothing quite like making people feel obligated to hang out with you . I mean you don't have to come out for drinks on my birthday...I was just there for YOUR birthday with a card and a bouquet of flowers I mean...no, no. It's fine. Whatever.

7) Legitimacy. The older I get the more credible I seem as a human being. When you're older people believe what you say cuz you've 'been there, man'. And, I imagine, people say things like 'what are you 16?' less and less the older you get. 'I'm not 16, ok?! I'm 23! That's 7 years older than 16!'

I can't imagine why people pick on me so much.

8) Nostalgia. I can't help but think about where I've been and all the great things that have happened in my life around my birthday. It's nice to remember my friends and family and all the places I've been...I've done some cool shiz.